Single and Pregnant

Pregnancy is a time to celebrate family. Yet many women today find themselves single and pregnant. Sometimes by choice, and other times by their partners inability to accept responsibility. In fact, according to statistics, being single and pregnant is no longer a ‘condition’ afflicting only teenagers and there are thousands of woman making the empowered decision to go through pregnancy alone. The US Census reports that 1/3rd of the 6 million pregnant women over the age of 22 are single.

See – you ARE NOT alone.

Still, in a world that offers so much information for pregnant woman and ‘their husbands’ it can be hard to feel like your relationship status allows you to have a socially ‘accepted’ pregnancy when you go it alone. However, the good news is that the times are changing. Women today are making empowered and smart choices about whether or not partnering with the father of their child is a good idea, and often realize that going it alone is a better option in the long run. Even better is that women who proceed with their pregnancies solo are able to find wonderful support systems from friends and family. Disappearing are the days of shot gun weddings and scarlet letters.

If you are single and pregnant (whether by choice or otherwise) you owe it to yourself to take the time to enjoy your pregnancy and feel happy about the new little baby that will be entering your life. There may be times when you wish you had the support of loving father figure to help you with your pregnancy, but this is not a time to dwell on what could have been.

You should also take time to look into resources both local and otherwise, that can help you financially and emotionally. There are many support groups for single mothers that can not only connect you with other single pregnant mothers, but can also help you make smart choices when it comes to future planning for you and your baby. The support system of other women who are facing the same challenges of you can be a lifesaver and you may find lifelong friends.

Of course, you will be worried about how you will take care of your baby. Keep in mind that there are millions of single mothers in the world today who support their children just fine. And you might be surprised how supportive friends and family members can be when it comes to planning for childcare. If the father of your baby refuses to be involved, you also have the option of collecting child support after the baby is born.

The most important thing to remember is that you are a powerful and capable person. The judgments and thoughts of other people are none of your business, and you should never feel ashamed nor embarrassed that you are single and pregnant. One of the most important aspects of raising a happy and healthy child is the presence of a happy and emotionally healthy mother. Certainly, it can be hard to forgive someone that you feel abandoned you – but learning to do so will only make your pregnancy, and your life after delivery more enjoyable and fulfilling. Remember the only actions that you can control are your own – and you are NOT responsible for the choices made by other people.

In so many ways, it is empowering that women today have a choice to have babies on their own. Rather than remaining stuck with irresponsible partners, or in abusive relationships or with people that they don’t really love or who would not be a good parent – women today are afforded the resources and RESPECT to do it alone. Hold your head high, and have faith that whatever challenges come your way will not be more than you can handle.

Written By Stef, Mother of 4 @MOM-SPIRATIONAL

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2018. All rights reserved.

The Truth About Single Parent Pregnancy

Whether you’re embarking on a single parent pregnancy by choice, by happy accident, or by a slightly less happy accident, there are a few things you need to know. In many ways single parent pregnancy is the same as a two parent pregnancy, however there are some ways that it’s very different. Here’s the truth about single parent pregnancy:

1. It will be hard at times – pregnancy is tough, whether you’re in a loving relationship or going it alone, pregnancy can take its toll. The sickness, fatigue, mood swings, breast tenderness, and aches and pains are there whether you’re single or not.

2. It is what it is – wishing things were different won’t help, and could leave you feeling less happy. Whatever your situation is, it’s yours. So own it and make it a happy one. Find the positives about your single parent pregnancy, and focus on them each and every day. Whether you are avoiding a lifetime in an unhappy relationship, or grabbing your last chance to have a baby, remember why you are embarking on this single parent pregnancy.

3. You call the shots – you won’t spend hours arguing over baby names only to have your favourites vetoed. You won’t face disagreements about parenting methods or birth choices. Compromise will not be at the centre of your decisions. As a single parent, you call the shots. You get to choose the name, you get to decide on nursery and parenting styles.

4. You’re not alone – there are lots of other single parents out there. Facing pregnancy alone can be daunting, especially when faced with expectant couples at every antenatal class. Reaching out to a network of other single pregnant women can help you to make new friends, find support, and meet people who understand what you’re going through. Look for a local group for single mums, or find an online community to join.

5. You’ll need help – you will need to reach out to friends and family for help. Not all the time, but sometimes. When you are experiencing the worst of your pregnancy sickness, or when the fatigue leaves you unable to tidy your house, or when you want someone’s hand to hold during routine test, you will need help. And that’s ok. There’s nothing wrong with relying on friends and family for support.

6. It will be worth it – yes pregnancy is tough, and it can feel scary at times to face pregnancy and motherhood alone, but it will all be worth it. When you are cradling your newborn in your arms, it will all slot into place, and you will know you made the right decisions. When your newborn’s eyes lock with yours, searching for answers, you will know that you are the only person for the job.

Written by Fiona, proud owner of a toddler, @fiona_peacock

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2018. All rights reserved.