Birth is a mystery – mainly because we rarely get to be a part of it. Throughout history, women shared birth by supporting each other through it. Young girls were exposed to birth – it was just another part of life. They knew what to expect and had seen how to cope. When their own labor started, they had at least some notion of what to do. Today, though, we rarely get to see birth. When we do, it’s a sanitized Hollywood version or a caricature of reality with grossly stereotyped actors and actions.

Storytelling has traditionally been the way that knowledge is passed on. And modern researchers suggest it’s because stories help our brains make sense of abstract thoughts and events. Stories help our brain make connections between reality and thought. Stories make us human.

Sharing your own birth story is a way you can help other women prepare for the births of their babies. Your experience will not only aid others in knowing the unknown, but will help you, as well. When you write about your birth experience, you preserve those special memories, you help your children understand where their own story started, and you may even be able to heal yourself if your birth was less than you expected.

Writing your tale doesn’t need to be complicated. You can choose to write longhand in a special journal, or type it all out at a keyboard. You might even use a voice recorder or dictation software if writing isn’t for you.

Start with the physical facts. Jot down everything you can remember. Ask your partner or any other support people who were present if they can remember details you may have forgotten.

Don’t judge your experience. Add emotions – consider how you felt at different times from the first contraction to the weeks following the birth. There’s no right or wrong – only what you know to be true.

Go back after a few days and edit. Add more details as they come to you. This is the opportunity to take your memories and smooth them out into a cohesive story.

Finally, share your story. You might decide to save it for your child’s eyes only. You might share it with family and friends. Or you might share it with a much wider audience by choosing an online resource publishing women’s birth stories.

Every woman has a story to tell – and her story is important to the preservation of women’s ways of knowing. The value of this knowledge connects one generation to the next through the tales we tell our daughters, nieces, friends, family, women we might not even know.

Written by Michelle, childbirth instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

You’re sure you will remember the birth of your baby forever. You are certain you won’t forget those sleepless nights. But as time goes on and you get busier, the memories lose their sharpness. Was it my first birth or my third birth where I wanted to give up and walk out? I know I was sad when he weaned, but I can’t remember it exactly. How did I decide on when to leave him with a sitter for the first time?

Keeping a journal has many benefits beyond simply preserving memories in scrapbook-like fashion. Writing in a journal can help you clarify your thoughts and process your feelings. It can help you find context for your emotions and help you make decisions. It can remind you of what’s important and what’s not. It can give you a safe space to think and just be yourself.

Whether you buy an elegantly bound blank book and write in your favorite colored pen, or you type your thoughts into a file on your laptop, keeping a journal as a new mom allows you to think through your birth, your parenting choices, and your feelings about being a mom.

You’re not sure what to write? Start with your birth story. Don’t just record the facts, but add your reactions. Were you scared, empowered, awed, exhausted? Write about the first days with a new baby or the first time you held your baby in your arms – how did you change from woman to mother, how did your relationships change, what did your heart tell you? Include your baby’s milestones, but add your feelings about them.

If you find that you need ideas to get your creativity flowing, search the Internet for writing prompts specific to motherhood. Use the notes section in your phone to jot down memories as they happen and write more about them when you have time. Start with a sentence stem such as “I feel it’s important to …” or “if I could wish one thing for today ….”

The hardest part may be finding the time to write. Try to make it a routine – allow yourself 15 minutes before you go to sleep or right when you wake. Even just writing one sentence per day can get you started (and can be an extremely telling journal in the end!). Or set a timer for five minutes and just write whatever comes to mind.

Nobody is going to edit your writing – so no need to cross anything out or agonize over grammar and word choice. You may decide to share the journal with your grown child someday, or you might decide to just keep it private. Making that decision early on may cause you to censor what you write, so leave your options open.

Writing will help you to become more creative in all parts of your life. You will learn about yourself, and grow as a parent. Journaling gives you a non-judgmental space in which to just be yourself – in all of your messy glory!

You can also use the Diary section of our Baby+ App to create your own journal. This may make it easier to write and add photos at the same time. You can also export this Diary via the App using the Baby Yearbook feature.

Written by Michelle, childbirth instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.