Healthcare professional inspecting stomach of a pregnant woman while her partner is standing by

Top 11 Concerns of Labor and Delivery

According to the book, Birthing From Within, the following are the top 11 concerns of labor and delivery for pregnant woman.

1) Not being able to stand the pain

2) Not being able to relax

3) Feeling rushed, or fear of taking too long

4) My pelvis is not big enough

5) My cervix won’t open

6) Lack of privacy

7) Being judged for making noise

8) Being separated from the baby

9) Having to fight for my wishes to be respected

10) Having intervention and not knowing if it is necessary or what else to do

11) Pooping during labor

As you can see, it is apparently natural for women to worry about all sorts of things prior to giving birth. Most of this worry and concern comes from a sense of not knowing what to expect, and of course the worries that everything will work out as planned. We are conditioned to feel like we are in control of our lives, and the unknown (as well as the high stakes of labor and delivery) tamper with our sense of control.

The good news is that a little bit of worry and apprehension is okay. Your concern for what might happen stems from the love you feel for your baby. But rather than let your worries get the best of you, try these simple tips for regaining your sense of control.

First, make sure that you have a birthing plan that you go over with your family members and your doctors. Most birthing centers will have you fill one out when you visit the hospital. This gives you time to make clear decisions about your wishes during labor and delivery, and enables you to have some records on file so that doctors and nurses can make sure your wishes are followed. Plus, making a birthing plan ahead of time ensures that you won’t have to make snap decisions in the delivery room when your thinking wont be as clear.

Talk to other pregnant moms and family members and friends. You are not alone in giving birth. Women have been giving birth since the beginning of time, and while many people will fill you with horror stories – others will reassure you that all will be well.

Another good piece of advice is to trust your body. Thoughts like “What if I can’t give birth,” or “What if my cervix won’t dilate,” are normal concerns. But trust in your body. Your body knows what it is doing, and as long as you listen to what it is telling you, you will fine. Plus, medical intervention has come so far today that there are very little things that could happen that a doctor won’t be able to help you with.

Remind yourself that your labor and delivery is a personal part of your life. YOUR LIFE. Who cares what others think? Who cares if you poop, or make noise, or if you cry? This is about YOU and YOUR family. The people who are there with you love you and if they respect you, then you should have no worries about being embarrassed or ashamed of ANYTHING that happens during labor and delivery.

Recognize that worrying about pain is normal. It does not mean you are selfish. And just because people tell you that you won’t remember the pain afterwards doesn’t mean that you can easily dismiss a fear of pain. Doctors today can make labor and delivery as comfortable as possible, and YOU ARE TOUGHER THAN YOU THINK!

When the worries get the best of you, just sit back and relax and breathe. Think about your future with your baby. Think positive thoughts and try to keep yourself busy. Find people to talk to about your feelings, and don’t hold anything in. Remember, YOU GOT THIS!

Written By Stef, Mom of 4 @Mom-Spirational

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2018. All rights reserved.

Team Health & ParentingTop 11 Concerns of Labor and Delivery

Comments 36

  1. Suzanne

    Dear All,

    Everyone is talking about trusting your body but how about trusting the Creator of your body instead?

    He is the One who has created the baby and we have to trust He will help and guide us through.
    His wisdom is in every single thing.

    Wishing you all the best and stay strong because that is what women are.

    Kind Regards,

    A muslim sister

  2. Joana

    My baby is breech (38 weeks 4 days). Everything was absolutely fine but now I’m booked in for a c section. Cannot stop crying. I feel like I have failed but I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong. I’m so worried. Hope it all goes well. Good luck to all.

  3. Se-Ren

    I’m 38 weeks and 4 days.
    This is my first pregnancy and I’ve been having lots of worries about labour and pain throughout the entire 9 months. Everyone keeps saying that I should trust my body as my body knows better what it’s doing and as a women I will know when the time it’s right to bring my little girl into the world. I truly believe that, although that does not mean I will stop going through my birthing plan with my partner over and over to make sure he got it right.
    I just got a rest from being a nesting-freak to focus on what my body is telling me, my little girl can come anytime now and this article gave me that small push of happy thoughts that I need for this final step.

  4. Becka

    I’m 38 weeks and 4 days. This is my first pregnancy and I’ve been having lots of worries about labour and pain throughout the entire 9 months. Everyone keeps saying that I should trust my body as my body knows better what it’s doing and as a women I will know when the time it’s right to bring my little girl into the world. I truly believe that, although that does not mean I will stop going through my birthing plan with my partner over and over to make sure he got it right.
    I just got a rest from being a nesting-freak to focus on what my body is telling me, my little girl can come anytime now and this article gave me that small push of happy thoughts that I need for this final step.

  5. Manshuk

    I’m 35.2 weeks. I am scared of pain and long labour and tearing. Other things are natural, pooping, crying is normal. Who doesn’t do it every other day ( excluding crying of course). I am trying to educate myself more and walking everyday. I also vizualizr my sweet first baby and can’t imagine how Happy i can be soon.

  6. Kim

    This is by far my favorite article written on this blog. The comments are reassuring-im not alone. These sort fears are not always discussed openly. This is my 7th pregnancy, 5th baby and i still have fears of; pooping during labor, pain and baby being healthy.

  7. Kate

    This will be my third baby and my 2nd planned home birth. My 1st was a spontaneous labour and second I needed a sweep done as I was 2 weeks over due. Both labours where very different and the results at the end the same, two gorgeous boys! It’s natural to worry about everything in life BUT labour is a big deal. U know there is likely to be some pain but your body really does guide you through. It communicates with you just like it does when your poorly or starting your cycle. It gives you little indications and guides you. As my 1st labour was with epidural, I didn’t know what I’d feel with my 2nd at home and it was wonderful. I was in labour for 6 hours but it felt like no time at all. That birth had me floating on air for months after it was amazing. My done came into the world weighing 9lb 5oz and I did that at home, with a little has and air….I have a tiny frame and was told to expect a small baby….but I did that, my body told me what to do. I just tried to relax as much as I could and work with what my body told me. Now I dnt take pain well, but I did it and it’s made me so excited about this birth. Just take each step as it comes and have belief in yourself.

  8. Kristen

    I don’t know about anyone else, but I find more comfort in reading the words of the other mothers that post AFTER the article than from the article itself! When you say that you’re a wimp, but you did it and now you’re excited this time around, it gives me hope. When you remind me that the hospital staff has ‘been there, done that’, I feel less worried and less embarrassed. I feel like we, as women, really need to support eachother more. No one needs the horror story of how you tore or asked for the epidural too late and thought you were gonna rip in two lol, because I know that I’ve run through every potential scary scenario in my mind multiple times!! I especially love reading, and rereading, that women have been giving birth since the beginning of time just fine. It reminds me that if they were ok giving birth out in the fields or at home without electricity or medicine, I will be more than okay in a hospital in the city with the worlds BEST doctors and nurses. #BostonStrong💙

  9. Melanie

    I’m 41 years old and having my 5th child; currently 32 weeks. First four were natural births and No epidurals. This one will be a c section. It’s been 9 years since my last baby and I still remember the pain. Either way, pain is still involved. And as difficult as this pregnancy has been; due to age, I’m trying to enjoy every minute of it. Growing pains and all. No sense in worry about petty stuff, as long as the baby grows and thrives until term and beyond. Just being able to have a child is a blessing. Every pregnancy is different, and each one adds character to our lives.

  10. Naomi

    38&5 days scared to death I will pass my due date..and becouse I can’t sleep so scared I won’t have the strangest to push but can’t wait to see my boy it been a long ride..🍼😊

  11. Jenny

    Im 38 week 4 days pregnant. Im getting induced in two days. Im a bit nervous and really excited to meet my first baby boy!! This blog is awesome! Well, since I couldn’t make it though without crying that says it all! U got this ladies!!! Good luck n god bless!

  12. Jamie

    I loved this article! It covered pretty much everything and gave me a mantra to repeat ‘I got this!’ If I get overwhelmed or worried. I am 38+4 today and want my girl to hurry up. I want to meet her and since I have had spd for the last few weeks I can’t wait for my body to at least start getting back to normal. Yesterday I had a real energy burst got loads of things done and no nap all day. Maybe she’s decided it’s nearly time 😃. Good luck to all wishing you a happy festive season, Jamie x

  13. Melissa

    Well hello, I am 39 weeks. Waiting for my water to brake lol. I am soooo excited and anxious. This is my first pregnancy, and I’ve got this!!!! I just want to see my baby girl’s precious face. ♡♡♡♡ best wishes for all of you mommies.

  14. Samantha

    Currently 38w 4d
    I am freakimg out and this is my 3rd! I have been ok through out the whole pregnancy so far but at this very moment I am sitting in hospital getting induced first lot of gel has stopped working but doctor is breaking my waters first thing in the morning, so it’s a sleepless night for me I hope that doesn’t come to bite me in the behind later on! :/

  15. Madison

    My doctor is super hot that’s why I’m most concerned about pooping during delivery. Can you say embarrassing?

  16. Kirst

    I’m 38+4 weeks and I’m so scared of not knowing if I’m in labour and that my partner will not be there. I’m not scared of being loud or any of the reasons listed I think those things are just normal

  17. Fleur

    I don’t like the article I’m afraid. Makes it sound like women don’t trust their body and don’t trust their health care providers, and that these things are normal. They’re not. It’s quite sad women are made to feel so insecure as a result of pregnancy being overmedicalised.

  18. Tabetha

    I’m 38w4d today… I’m just ready for this pain to be over! I pooped & got torn during my last labor (6lb4oz)…first labor was premature, a breeze! I just have that feeling I’m going to tear with this baby because I’m big 😨

  19. Rocio

    my biggest fear is also that I won’t know that I’m in labor and that I won’t realize it.. & I want to have a normal natural vaginal birth I am scared to have a c-section.. I don’t care if I scream of poop the nurses and doctors at the hospital have gone through everything at all that can happen that’s their job lol they won’t care if you are screaming or anything like that lol..

  20. Tamara

    This was such a useful post! Although my biggest fear isn’t on that list (what if I don’t realise I’m in labour?) it put my mind at ease for a lot of other fears. I’m due next week and touch wood my body knows what it’s doing!

  21. Niki

    Most of these don’t bother me…my biggest fear is that I’ll go into labour or have my waters break and not realise. This is my first (38+4 today) and I am so paranoid my waters will break in the shower or I’ll think labour contractions are Braxton Hicks and will just miss that I’ve gone into labour…

  22. Mariam

    Hello.. It’s my first pregnancy and I’m scared to death.. I just want to have a normal vaginal delivery.. Wish me luck

  23. Jacey

    Caroline I’m 33+6 and I have had barely any symptoms throughout my pregnancy except for the 6-10 weeks and all the baby growing pains and emotions have all hit me at 31 weeks. I’ve cut my work back and nothing changed. Pretty sure it’s just the hormones, thanks for the website too!!

  24. Emma

    Take every decision as it comes at the minute and try not to worry before hand ladies. As long as mum and baby are healthy a few stitches are a drop in the ocean! It’s only natural to worry about the unknown so try reading up on professional websites or ask your healthcare professional any questions. It seems everyone wants to share their horrible stories but my first two pregnancies/deliveries were lovely experiences, slightly painful but oh so worth it!
    Think positive ladies the end result is amazing!

  25. Caroline

    I think I’m being pretty calm about most of it. My current “thing” is my emotions. I’m 30 weeks +4 and I’ve started getting really emotional. I don’t know if it’s due to stress at work or just hormones. Anyone else getting this?
    As for tearing, my anti natal class went through some stretches you can do to help prevent tearing. It won’t always work but I figured it was worth a try. It’s called Perineal Massage. It sounds a bit freaky when you read through how to do it but I guess anything’s worth a shot! You’ll find it on the Internet at the University of Michigan School of Nursing website at http://www.umich.edu/~umperl/massage.htm
    Hope it helps! For all of us!! Good luck, ladies! x

  26. Naomi

    Thank you Michelle! I feel a lot better after reading that. It’s my first baby and at 24 weeks I’m slowly starting to get nervous, as people are only telling me horrible birthing stories! I try to push past it and focus on bringing a healthy son into the world no matter what it takes

  27. Second time mum

    I screamed the house down with my first and said alot of choice words. Ill be opting for an epidural with this labor. But there is no point in worrying about any of these things. Just take it as it comes.

  28. kyemother of ty-and-soon to be Taylor

    With epidural I felt no pain ,I ripped but didn’t feel a thing. If you and your baby are healthy don’t stress over little things cuz after you’ll b thinking why was I so worried. Me I admit I did worry with my first because of every ones story about their births but remember everyone and every pregnancy is different. Congratulations to all of you expecting moms
    #01/15/2013*tyshaun
    #09/26/2014*Taylor:)

  29. Michelle

    Naomi I had exactly the same worry with my first I dreaded tearing and needing stitches so much constantly thinking about it wondering how I’d cope, and my worst fear came true I did need to be cut as there were complications but the doctor and midwives were fantastic. It’s ok to be scared but it was no where near as bad as the worry. I just remember thinking id do what ever I needed to help my son safely arrive and that took over. I no it’s easier said than done but honestly try not to worry, the worry is honestly worse than the process. It’s amazing what we manage to cope with when wer in labour I’m the biggest wimp and how I did it il never no but I did and I’m exactually a little excited this time round. Good luck and keep thinking positive chances are it won’t even happen but if it does it’s ok to worry a little just don’t let it take over youl meet your little one soon after 🙂

  30. Palesa

    Am 37 weeks pregnant and I gt nervous everytime I think of labor especially when I think of the pain makes me wanna fast forward the whole process wen its time…it’s my first baby and I don’t know what to expect I’ve got alot of questions running through my head

  31. Naomi

    I’m so terrified of getting cut or tearing I’m actually having nightmares! To the point they are everynight and I wake up in tears…

  32. Lana

    Same here….who cares about pooping and screaming as long as my baby is born alive and healthy.

  33. Eleanor

    Good grief, it hadn’t occurred to me to worry about ANY of those things – I just want my babies to be born alive and healthy! Compared to that, what does a bit of mess or the odd scream matter?

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