Pregnancy: Keeping the Romance Alive

Between the afternoon naps, the breakfast throw ups and the tender breasts, you may not be feeling your best right now. You may find that your reduced energy levels mean you can just about make it through the day, before collapsing on the sofa unable to move again for a good 12 hours.

While your body is busy nurturing and nourishing your unborn child, you need to make sure you’re taking the same care of your other relationships, including with your partner. Pregnancy can put a huge amount of strain on a relationship. Financial worries, mood swings, insecurities over being good parents, and an ever growing to do list, can leave you both feeling a little frayed around the edges. So how do you make sure you take care of each other, and your relationship, during pregnancy?

1. Make time for each other – yes there is lots to do and a bump-shaped ticking time bomb waiting to go off, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have date night. Make the most of your last months alone – go to the cinema, eat out and enjoy spending time together (without having to fork out on a babysitter).

2. Talk about other things – it’s only natural that the pregnancy is taking up all of your thoughts, but do try to talk about other things too. If you just talk about the baby, it’s easy to forget you are a couple – it’s easy to fall into the parent trap.

3. Take a babymoon – this will be your last chance to go away hassle free. No worrying about travel cots, babysitters or nap schedules. You can disappear, just the two of you, and spend some quality time together.

4. Be intimate – depending on your hormones, you may feel erotically charged or absolutely turned off. If you’re feeling turned off, it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy each other. While you may not want your sore breasts touched, or you may not feel in the mood for penetrative sex, there may be other ways you can be intimate. Even if it’s just snuggling on the sofa, intimacy and physical contact are important for a healthy relationship.

5. Tell him he’s important – it can be easy to put all of your focus on the baby, and your partner may end up feeling a little left out. Everyone will be focusing on you and how you’re feeling, you will be focusing on the baby and the pregnancy, and it might feel like no-one is looking after the dad-to-be. Make sure you look after him, and let him know how much he means to you. Tell him how much you’re looking forward to seeing him as a father, and why you know he’ll be great at it.

Do you have any tips for keeping the romance alive during pregnancy?

Written by Fiona, proud owner of a toddler, @fiona_peacock

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2017. All rights reserved.

Fiona PeacockPregnancy: Keeping the Romance Alive

Comments 14

  1. Sarah Marie

    My darling one & I spend a lot of time with each other, especially because I have a genetic condition that makes any possibility of preterm delivery a bit frightening for us… We have had some issues only recently with pain after sexual intimacy, so we changed a few things… We were both lovers of water as teenagers, so we went out of our comfort zone & went swimming at a local lagoon, we had a wonderful time! Now we plan to do it more often, there is always a way to be loving, warm & show your endearment to your future daddy… Shake things up, do something different, you may end up rekindling a past time activity you both loved years or months before… It can ease tension around the rough edges of being pregnant too…

  2. Yiyao

    I am 28 weeks pregnant and thanks to the reminder I went out for a romantic dinner with my husband and we are planning a babymoon before our little girl comes to the world. I have to admit that preparing for the arrival of the baby takes me much time and energy, but still I shouldn’t forget to spend some quality time with my partner.

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  4. Emily

    I’m 28 weeks with my first baby girl and my man is excited, but seems to be overwhelmed when I try to plan things for her arrival. Our sex life is as good as ever, but sometimes I feel like he should be more prepared and take more time for me and the pregnancy. This pregnancy business is hard and I would like a little more recognition!

  5. Shabana

    Sanna’s mother
    I m 27 weeks And 6 days pregnant. I am very Happy With my second pregnancy. I have lots of pain but still excited to see my son soon. My hubby is always with me and he loves me a lot and I love him too. He knows that I love him so much and he is taking care of me a lot nowadays. I think my hubby is the best 😉

  6. Eman Hafez

    I find it hard to believe that talk, because he is the most important in my life and my two boys, I feel so tired trying to satisfy everyone, he is so busy to even see how much I ‘m suffering, I love him so much, but I feel like having this child alone since he is missing out all the preparation and appointments, I ‘m 27 weeks but he didn’t ask me if we should choose the cot or the car seat, so I want the romance but I can’t have it a lone !!!

  7. Meem

    I’m 27 weeks pregnant with our first baby .. And this is a good reminder focusing on the baby may keep ur partner left out .. And my husband started asking me will u still love me after the baby is born .. So I try to make time for us like movie nights works our going to a hotel for a change .. The sex part is hard and since the bump is growing it’s much harder trying to find a position that works for both of us .. And how our little girl loves to move when we get in the mood for sex .. Like there is a third person with us watching 😄 still working on the sex area.. And also I know how he is stressed out about the pregnancy but doesn’t show it like he is the stronge one .. But since I got pregnant we both changed and became much closer .. So good luck to all mamas and papas out there ❤️

  8. Kate

    I find it hard to tell him how much he means to me because am always talking about our baby and he is too busy too so just can’t wait to have our baby and maybe been a new daddy in town will help him change

  9. rhianna

    I tried making it work with my oh but it didn’t work out, I didn’t feel any love for him anymore and I felt I was with him for the wrong reasons after realising the love had gone but we are still friends for the babies sake.

  10. melissa c

    I really enjoy every moment my husband and I spend together! It never fails every time we watch a movie together I fall asleep. Our sex life is amazing and we are doing really well with this change! Soon to be mother of three:)6 more weeks!!!!

  11. Steffi

    We booked a Wellness weekend together and promised to turn off our cell phones and Laptops to just enjoy ourselves as a couple. Probably the last opportunity for a looooong time then. If you can’t take time for each other during the stressy day I guess it’s the best to set fixed dates like “the Saturdays are only for us two, no family, no friends around”.

  12. Dominique

    My husband and i have a very clear understanding that if we are not unified as a couple, what example are we leaving for our child on the way?! Strong marriages are few and far between now a days and and lot of that tends to be due to putting the child’s well being first before your own marriage. As much as this blessing means to us of having the honour of raising a child together, we remind ourselves that when the child has grown and gone from our home, we still need each other beyond that short time to a last till the end of time. Keeping your romance and and each other yes even before your child will help you raise and even stronger child and a stronger relationship in the end too.

  13. AngieDJ

    Great Reminder! It really is easy to forget and nowadays. Being overwhelmed and feeling worried helps me get pissed off so easily-it’s rough. For him and me- because this isn’t my usual self. Hopefully I can calm down somehow, refocus, and enjoy these last eleven weeks together. Sighs