As many as 15% of new mums suffer from postpartum mood disorders, including postpartum depression. You may have heard people talk about the baby blues, and the impact of postpartum hormonal changes on mood, but postpartum depression is more than that.

It’s important to be able to recognise the signs of postpartum depression in yourself and others, because the sooner this condition is diagnosed, the sooner treatment can begin.

It is not known what causes postpartum depression. Having a baby is a life-changing and stressful event. Exhaustion and stress are almost inevitable as you adjust to life as a new parent, and this may play a part in the onset of postpartum depression. Hormonal changes also contribute. You have an increased risk of developing postpartum depression if you:

• have a family history of depression
• have a personal history of depression or other mood disorders, such as bipolar disorder

Symptoms of postpartum depression

The symptoms of postnatal depression most often begin during the first two months after the birth, but may start any time in the first year postpartum. You may experience some of the following symptoms:

• persistent low moods
• persistent feeling of sadness
• loss of interest in the world around you
• inability to feel joy
• fatigue
• trouble sleeping
• inability to concentrate and/or make decisions
• low self-confidence
• loss of interest in food, or comfort eating
• feelings of guilt
• suicidal thoughts
• self-harming
• frightening thoughts

Around half of all sufferers experience frightening thoughts of harming their baby. These thoughts are part of the condition, and do not mean you are a bad mother. It is rare for either mother or baby to be harmed as a result of postpartum depression.

Diagnosis and treatment

If you think you may be experiencing postpartum depression, you should contact your healthcare provider immediately. Your healthcare provider will be able to diagnose the condition by asking a series of questions. Some women are scared to seek help because they worry that their babies will be taken from them. In reality it is very, very rare for babies to be taken from their mothers because of postpartum depression. This would only ever occur in very exceptional circumstances.

Your healthcare provider is best placed to advise you on treatment options, and this will depend on the severity of your condition. Treatment options include:

• counseling and therapy
• medication

There are things you can do to help alleviate the symptoms of postpartum depression, for example:

• talk about how you feel – whether it’s to your partner, friends, family or a group for sufferers, talking about your feelings may help
• exercise – this is a proven way to treat depression, so try to exercise a few times a week
• get out of the house – if you’re feeling low and want to hide indoors, try to force yourself to leave the house. Even just taking a quick stroll around the block can help
• eat healthily – skipping meals and eating poorly can make you feel worse, so try to eat a healthy balanced diet
• rest – get as much sleep as you can. If you can’t sleep, rest instead
• accept help from friends and family

It can be hard to admit you are suffering from postpartum depression, and telling other people about it can be even harder. Try to remember, telling your healthcare provider is the first step on the road to recovery.

Written by Fiona, proud owner of a toddler, @fiona_peacock

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2018. All rights reserved.

It’s a simple fact of life that not all pregnancies are planned. For some, seeing the positive test is not necessarily a time for celebration. In fact, some women may find this moment devastating. You may consider yourself too young to have a baby, or perhaps you feel your family is already complete. It could be relationship problems or financial insecurity causing you to worry about the timing of the pregnancy.

Once you have decided to progress with the pregnancy, it doesn’t mean you will feel any less shocked, or that you will all of a sudden feel 100 percent happy about the pregnancy. Even women who have tried for years to fall pregnant can experience feelings of regret during the pregnancy.

Unplanned doesn’t mean unloved

Some women experiencing unplanned pregnancies report feelings of guilt and shame around their pregnancy. It is crucial to remember that unplanned doesn’t mean unloved. Your pregnancy may have been unplanned, but that doesn’t mean you will be any less able to love your baby.

Talk about your feelings

During pregnancy, the hormonal changes, fatigue and worry over what is to come, can feel overwhelming. It’s important to talk about how you are feeling – your worries, concerns and even regrets. It is important you find a trusted person to talk to, whether that be your partner, best friend, or a support service. Do not feel ashamed of your feelings, it is completely natural to have mixed feelings about an unplanned pregnancy, and talking about it may help you to deal with these emotions.

Find support

All new parents require a strong support system, whether the pregnancy was planned or not. Having a baby is a big life change, and you will need help, especially in the early days. This support could be in the form of help with the baby or around the home, or it could be a friendly ear on tough days. Make sure you have a support system in place, and let them know in advance that you might call on them for help when the baby arrives.

Financial planning

One of the main worries for women carrying unplanned pregnancies, is the financial aspect of parenting. If you weren’t planning to have a baby just yet, chances are you haven’t got lots of money to go and blow in a baby store. As soon as possible, you should sit down and work out your finances. Speak to your employer, student services or a family planning clinic, to find out about your access to financial help. Will you qualify for maternity leave, or receive some other benefits once the baby arrives?

Planning for the future

If you’re young, and worried that having a baby will prevent you from doing certain things in life, write a to do list. Fill it with all the things you’d like to do, and all the places you want to visit in your life. Once you’ve got your list, you can start working towards things. Having a baby doesn’t mean your life is over. It may take you a little longer to achieve things now, but it doesn’t mean you have to cross them off your list for good.

Most importantly, let go of the guilt. Do not feel guilty for having an unplanned pregnancy You will still be a great mother.

Written by Fiona (@Fiona_Peacock), mother, writer and lover of all things baby related.

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2017. All rights reserved.

Many new mums experience the ‘baby blues’ within a few days of giving birth. After the initial oxytocin-induced natural high of meeting your baby for the first time, the baby blues can come as a bit of a shock. One minute you are over the moon, truly and utterly in love, and the next minute you are sobbing over the sink because your partner bought the wrong type of washing up sponge. It may feel a bit like you’re losing your mind; but don’t worry, the baby blues are a common postpartum symptom, and usually nothing to worry about.

What causes the baby blues?
Two to four days after giving birth, your hormone levels rapidly drop, and this is thought to be one of the causes of the baby blues. During this time, there are also chemical changes occurring, and new hormones being released to trigger bonding and milk production. That’s a lot happening at once, so it’s no wonder you’re left feeling a bit drained.

On top of that, you’re exhausted after the birth, and you’ve just been handed this wonderful, perfect little bundle who probably doesn’t sleep for very long. It can be a very scary feeling when you leave the hospital for the first time, and you realise you are in charge of a baby. It’s easy to worry that you’re under-qualified for the job. Add to this breastfeeding problems, birth recovery, the cries of a newborn baby, and the fact you’re too tired to shower.  Anyone would be feeling a bit weepy, even without the hormonal changes.

Symptoms of the baby blues
As many as 80 percent of new mums experience the baby blues. Possible symptoms include:

• weepiness
• anxiety
• irrational worry about your new baby
• irritability
• inability to concentrate
• feeling emotional

The baby blues will disappear by the time your baby is 10 days old. If you are still feeling low after that time, you should speak to your healthcare provider.

Battling the baby blues
The baby blues isn’t an illness, and there’s nothing you can do to ‘cure’ it. All you can do, is try to relax, take things easy, and wait for the blues to pass. The following tips may help you to minimise the impact of the baby blues:

• rest – get as much rest as possible. Easier said than done with a new baby in the house, but feeling overtired can heighten your emotions and leave you feeling worse.
• let it out – if you need to cry, cry. You might feel better after a good long weep. Bottling things up, and refusing to talk, can make your problems seem bigger and scarier than they really are.
• me time – it is so hard to get me time during those first few weeks, but try to give yourself some time to unwind. Run a nice warm bath, and have a soak for an hour or so. Leave the door unlocked though, because chances are the baby will want a feed as soon as you sit down.
• visitors – keep your visitors to a minimum, and don’t be afraid to cancel on people if you’re not feeling up to seeing them. Your mental health and wellbeing are important, so feel free to take some time to hibernate with your new family.
• talk – talk to your partner, your best friend, your mum – whoever you need to talk to to feel better. Let them know how you’re feeling, just talking can leave you feeling so much better.

Written by Fiona (@Fiona_Peacock), mother, writer and lover of all things baby related.

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

Motherhood, like pregnancy, is meant to be filled with sunshine, lollipops and rainbows, right? Moms are always happy and filled with joy. After all, motherhood is the best job is the world. Isn’t it?

Erm, no, not always. Sometimes motherhood sucks. Sometimes being a mom is all about being covered in crap, cleaning up puke and listening to babies scream. It’s not always fun or wonderful, like anything else in life, it has its bad days.

It’s perfectly ok for you to not love every minute of motherhood. Singing nursery rhymes and spending hours talking about poop isn’t for everyone. Looking after a baby all day can be tough. The baby can’t talk back, so you may find yourself feeling bored at times. You may also find the repetitive chores of diaper changes and feeds to be tiring sometimes, especially when they seem to fill your entire day.

Here are a few things to try if you feel you’re not enjoying motherhood:

1. Let go of the guilt

There is nothing wrong with not loving motherhood. You’re allowed to have bad days. You’re allowed to have days where you don’t want to change another diaper. You can have days where you’re bored out of your mind. It’s fine, it’s normal. Every mom feels like that sometimes. You don’t need to feel guilty because you’re not a picture of the joyous mom you see represented in the media. You’re a real person, you’re going to have bad days.

2. Talk about it

You don’t need to keep these feelings to yourself. This isn’t a hideous secret you need to take to your grave. In fact, talking about it with friends might just help you to see how normal these feelings are. You’re not a terrible mom, you’re just like everybody else. Speak to your close friends about how you feel, and let your partner in on it too. While your mom friends will be able to reassure you that what you’re feeling is normal, your partner may be able to free up a little me-time for you so you can de-stress.

3. Get out of the house

A change of scenery can do the world of good when you’re having a bad day. If it’s just you and the baby stuck at home all day, getting out of the house might cheer you up. Pack your diaper bag, grab your handbag and head off on an adventure. You could meet up with some mom friends for a coffee or head out for a walk in the countryside. Do whatever you think will lift your mood. You deserve a treat, being a mom isn’t easy, so head out and enjoy yourself.

4. Recognize your triumphs

It’s easy to obsess over your perceived feelings. If you feel like everything is going wrong at the moment, that’s probably more to do with your mood than anything else. When you feel negative, it’s all too easy to only see the negative things around you. Spend some time focusing on the good things in life. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. Make a list of all the reasons you’re a great mom and refer to it whenever you’re feeling down.

5. Ask for help

If you’re worried that perhaps the way you’re feeling isn’t normal, you should ask your healthcare provider for advice. Postpartum depression is treatable, but you need to reach out for help before you can get treatment. Nobody will judge you for speaking up, so be honest and ask for help if you think you need it.

Do you sometimes feel like you’re not enjoying motherhood?

Written by Fiona (@Fiona_Peacock), mother, writer and lover of all things baby related.

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.